I Am Very Disappointed In You

I have been saying for well over a year how great my customers are, I have had some nice e-mails and calls just to say how happy they are. In my many years of dealing with customers I have never such a good group to deal with.

Recently we had a not so good customer though, I know I am not supposed to talk badly about customers, but I want to, so I guess I will.

This guy sent us a e-mail to let us know he had not received his package yet, it was very late, it had been 25 days since we shipped it, and we had paid for the 10 day service.

Since we are aware that United States Postal Service has been really slow at delivering lately, and have also been updating their tracking system on the Internet slowly, I filed in a few forms, made some phone calls, and sent some faxes to find out where this package was. We have never lost a package so we don’t really think it could be completely lost.

Meanwhile this guy keeps e-mailing us, and mentions at one point he does not want to sign for the package when it gets there, he soon starts demanding an immediate refund, and all sorts of other things on almost an hourly basis.

In one of his e-mails he said to me, “I am very disappointed”

I held off on the refund, and waited for the investigation to finish, we are already into this shirt for almost $17 or so with purchasing, packing and shipping.

After a few days I get a phone call that the postal  investigation was finished, and this guy already had his shirt. What a dickhead, not only was he trying to scam us but he bothers to make it personal by saying he is disappointed in us.

So I would just like to say to this loser who tries to steal $20 items on the Internet:

Your the kind of scum we not only don’t want as a customer, but are sad that you even exist on this earth.

We here, are all very disappointed in you!

We Can No Longer Relate

I grew up like most Canadian boys, watching hockey and American sitcoms on televison, and listening to rock and roll. Times with my friends were shared discussing these simular interests, how such and such should have passed the puck, the joke so and so said, and how some new album was about to be realeased, these are the things that helped pass the time with my friends back in the day.

Since I have became a world traveler, which was before the Internet was available, I was not able to keep up with the sports of my home country, the sitcoms, or the popular new music etc. I gained more worldly interests, such as trance music, jazz, new age, all sorts of classical and popular music from all over the globe, literature, history, and world events etc. On a weekly basis, I started to read magazines such as Time, Foreign Affairs, and Newsweek, as well as reading local newspapers whenever I could. When I watch television I like to watch channels like History Channel, Discovery Channel, Local News, CNN, BBC, CBC, Bloomberg’s etc. On the Internet, I read a lot of Wiki, and other intelligent websites.

The boys back home however still spend their media time watching sitcoms, and sports on television, or listening to rock and roll in their car on the way to work each day, most of them tuned to the same station they did twenty years ago.

I still speak with my old friends, though sadly not much anymore. When I do, at some point in the conversation, I will unintentionaly,  speak over most of their heads, they are unable to understand me anymore, some of them are  completly unable to comprehend, or believe some of the facts I pull out of the world news, some just dont care.

I have evolved beyond our past relationships,  I miss my friends, but I can not regress back to the way I used to be over 20 years ago. I hope one day we can find a common interest, and be close again, but I realize this will probably never happen, because I don’t think I know any hockey players by name anymore, and they likely will never travel, or become interested in the world, so therefore, we can no longer relate.

Man Won’t Hug Tree Shirt

Man won't hug tree shirt

Awww come on man the tree just wants a hug – Click Image $19.99 USD

Trees are stupid, sticky, and smelly, they break the roads and sidewalks, and drop little pieces of themselves all over my house and car. I hate trees.

Oh I know the birds  like them, but who needs bird  poop on their cars, one time I had a bird poop on my head from a tree, and I didn’t like that either, if the tree wasn’t there than there would have been no bird poop on my head that day. Stupid birds in stupid trees, waking me up in the morning and pooping. If birds were civilized they would use the tree to wipe their bottoms like humans do.

I really like to cut down trees and burn them, the food I cook on the fire tastes especially good because I know it was cooked with tree.

At my work I help turn trees into  business reports, which we file away and never read again. This is what trees are for.

Yahoo Directory, Is it worth it?

Well about four months ago we were accepted into the Yahoo directory. They changed the title I wanted for the website, though it was not completely butchered.

They also put us in a local directory for Canada for some reason, I guess because I paid from my Canadian bank account. I requested being moved but got no response from them, I would have to say for the $300 US I spent, that was pretty lousy service. I ended up so buried in directories that the page I am on currently has no PageRank showing, and I doubt is Indexed by Google.

On top of that Yahoo actually sends me less traffic than they used to and the traffic coming from the actual directory does not exist. Is it a complete failure? It is too soon to tell, I still have 8 more months to hopefully get noticed by Google and have my PageRank go up.

I am going to link the directory page I am on here right now and hope Google picks up on it.

Really Funny Shirts

Good Monkey Like Beer, Not Like Banana T-Shirt

On March 8, 2010, my college Joe and I were brought to the Tuktoyaktuk headquarters of the NWO to have a meeting with “The Monkey”

Part of my work as a traveling photo journalist working on secret contract for the NWO, is of course the study of monkeys. In this case actually a Chimpanzee, who is not really a monkey, but this one believes he is so we wont argue with him. We were told The Monkey had a message to share with the world, and that we were here to collect, and publish it.

Upon arrival, we were guided through heavy security to a large room on top of the fortress.  We waited a few  minutes, then were instructed by a large heavily armed guard that The Monkey would see us now.

Funny Good Monkey Like Beer Not Like Banana Shirt

Good Monkeys Like Beer and Headphones, Not Bananas Shirt - $19.99 click on image

We followed the guard into  a very large room that almost  took up an entire floor of the huge fortress, books covered the walls, and there was a large lit fireplace with a reading lamp next to an beautiful leather armchair.

The Monkey was in the chair  stoking  the fire a bit with a black metal rod, after a moment, he looked up at us with his wise, all knowing  eyes.

He said, “You know, it has always been to my belief, after meeting with my fellow monkey companions, that in order to become above average, and considered a ” Good monkey”, you must do things differently than most of the masses.

The monkey took a long pause, and looked thoughtfully around the room, there was a shine in his eyes, I am not sure if it was  from the fire, or some sort of internal glow fueled by his great wisdom.

“What is your secret?” I asked him.

The Monkey picked up an ice cold  bottle of beer from beside his chair,  put on his headphones and began to sway to some music that my associate and I couldn’t hear, then he said something I will never forget.

“Good Monkey Like Beer Not Like  Banana.”

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