Darth Vader Smokes Shirt

Darth Vader Smoking Shirt

Darth Vader Smokes Shirt – Click Image

Darth was not a very good person, even though he came from a loving mother, for some reason, he did many horrible things. Standing in the way of anything Darth might do, or anywhere near it, was most often your death sentence.

Darth had a long history of evil deeds, some of which included going to war with his own children, imprisoning and torturing his only daughter, cutting off his son’s hand, and destroying entire planets just for the hell of it. Not to mention killing not only most of all his children’s friends, but also any of his own friends he could get his hands on, and their friends, and their children, and their children’s friends.

We all know Darth was not exactly a perfect role model, but did you know, he smokes too ?

Funny Shirts Changed My World

I don’t know if you have visited the retail part of this website yet, but I happen to have what I feel is several hundred of the funniest shirts ever created. I know that not everyone shares my sense of humor, some will likely be offended, and some people will just not get it, but to me I have the greatest collection of funny shirts in all the world. Believe it or not though, when I first started selling funny shirts, I was not the type of person who would actually wear them, in fact my original idea with this website was not to sell any funny t-shirts at all, but to sell a line of great tribal shirts I used to buy and wear. However by the time I was ready to sell the tribal shirts, the manufacturer of the shirts did a ridiculously stupid thing, he fired his artist, and stopped printing his great designs. I had already built the website and had to sell something, and so began my quest for really funny shirts.

As time went on, the website grew, and with it my collection of funny shirts, at the same time my own tribal t-shirts were becoming old, and my girlfriend used to laugh at how I was this great internet t-shirt retailer that wore old shirts with holes in them. I did see the humor in it, and having such a large collection of shirts on hand at any one minute, it was very easy just to toss the shirt in the trash and grab a new one. So one summer day, I tossed out my old shirt, grabbed one of my fresh beautiful funny shirts from my collection, a shirt I like to call Hypno Monkey featuring a chimpanzee wearing headphones in the middle of a yellow swirl, and stepped out the door to the public.

Hypno Monkey Shirt

I live in a very large and busy city that has a great public transportation system, so have not owned a car in years, it is not a matter of money, it is just to me cars were supposed to be a convenience, and the transit is so good here, to me they are actually an inconvenience. So after thirty seconds or so waiting for the bus, it arrived and I stepped on. Unfortunately no seat was available so two or three of us were forced to stand.

The bus left the stop and I was looking out the window enjoying the view, and looking around a bit at the other passengers, there was a young kid smiling at me, that was nice, and a very pretty brunet smiling at me, that was nice also, I of course smiled back at both of them, and the bus continued down the road. I looked around the bus again at a few people and noticed most of them were very friendly towards me. This seemed to continue with me all day long as I went to the mall and ate some lunch. I was feeling particularly handsome this day, since I must have had smiles and eye contact from about ten or so women by this time, and also a couple of men smiled at me, that was uncommon, and a bit mysterious. I didn’t really put two and two together until I went to wash my hands and looked in the mirror, which of course reflected back to me not only my face, but also that of the silly chimp on my shirt.

Wow I thought, if you smile the world smiles back at you, but if you wear a good funny shirt, the world smiles at you first, and then you smile back. Now that is something cool. I can’t believe I never knew this before. Also I found that I was actually walking around with a smile on my face more, not just because of the motion of smiling back, but because I was actually happier.

I wear funny shirts now most of the time, and my son does also, because of this we live in a happier world than we did before, people around us are all very nice to us, occasionally laughing can be heard around us, and sometimes people that normally would not talk to us strike up friendly conversations.

I understand the world was not changed by me wearingĀ  funny shirts, but without a doubt, wearing funny shirts changed my world.

Scream Panda Shirt

Scream Panda T-Shirt

Scream Panda Shirt – Click Image

Lighting flashes through the dark sky, and a cold heavy rain falls on the late night delivery truck as it lowers it’s precious cargo down from the rear. Curious zoo workers look in at the young panda, sitting very still at the back of it’s cage, facing the wall, seeming too focused on his own thoughts, to be interested in where he is, or the commotion around him.

The cage touches the ground, and the sky explodes in a blinding flash of lightning, a deafening clap of thunder follows, and a disoriented moment later, the workers notice the cage is now empty, except for a claw etched image of a ghostly figure on it’s back wall.

A passing crazy old guy begins to shout, “Evil will no longer allow itself to be contained !” and begins to slowly unbutton his trousers.

Scream Panda Shirt

Problem Solved Shirt

Problem Solved T-Shirt

Problem Solved – Click Image $19.99 USD

I was happily relaxing, when I began to hear the sounds of trouble working it’s way through the house. Doorways were being forcefully opened and closed, as the aggravator’s footsteps grew steadily louder. A grumbled murmuring began as she drew near, as though she was warming up her mouth’s well oiled engine for the marathon session ahead.

In the realization that I would soon be shanghaied onto another journey to Idiot Island, over it’s ocean of accusations, demands, insults and madness, I began to panic.

I had no door to escape through, so considered hurling myself through the glass of a nearby window. With just moments to spare before the verbal assault began, I finally found my salvation with a nearby music player.

 

Problem Solved.

So He Killed Your Dad Shirt

So He Killed Your Dad Shirt

So He Killed Your Dad Shirt - Click Image $19.99 USD

I wish I had missed my trip to the grocery store today, had not wandered towards the magazine racks, or stopped to thumb through “Fowls Of Fortune” magazine. If only I had forgotten my wallet, or lost the book on my way back home, then I couldn’t have responded to the classified advertisement in it’s back pages, and this sinister rendezvous would not be taking place.

My stomach is sick with the realization that I will soon have blood on my hands.

Out of shadows steps a dark figure, his face creased with the memories of the many evil things he employs himself to do. With my envelope of payment, the man in white, is now destined to pay for his deeds.

The large thug speaks, pointing towards a large image of the target, pasted on the white man’s house, “So, He Killed your dad ?”

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